Dear Family & Friends,

I keep a daily journal and at the end of each entry I write three things I’m grateful for. Normally, I write either in the evening or the morning (sometimes both). Closing or beginning the day with a clear and specific feeling of gratitude has shaped the way I reflect on myself and my experiences and helps me create a positive and open outlook. I believe these gratitude lists improve my memory as well. I sit back and think through all I have seen, smelled, heard, tasted, and felt over the course of a day.

In honor of Thanksgiving, here is a selection of my gratitudes copied directly from my journals: 

• June 12, 2023: 2) coconut palms to draw again
• June 13, 2023: 1) wonderful welcome, 2) a smooth bus ride, 3) many new trees to identify
• June 17, 2023: 1) Kate & Lea checking in on me & helping me out when I’m sick, 3) nice dinner with Miguel & Kate
• June 18, 2023: 1) for a warm & enthusiastic welcome — especially that hug from my host mom, 3) lots of trees & the calmness of a field nearby
• June 19, 2023: 1) the release of playing, 2) the opportunity to start local language soon, 3) fans!
• June 21, 2023: 2) my own self awareness, 3) staff joining in on our games of uno and basketball. Its nice to have that time together. 
• June 23, 2023: 1) growing friendships with several people 2) and good relationships with all, 3) the opportunity to learn a language particular to here — and one so different from other ones I know
• June 26, 2023: 2) the feeling of listening to good music, laying on a couch, & staring blankly outside.
• June 27, 2023: 1) the visit to the chief — wow! 2) the ease of talking to Mom & Dad last night
• June 28, 2023: 2) the human act of storytelling — the ability to make things up on the fly (I did that tonight at Ryan & Feroze’s request), 3) the openness & friendliness of folks here. I’m getting braver at greeting people who I know speak Kabiyé and I’mn met with nothing  but smiles, pleasure, & response to my desire to learn and speak, 4) The power of memory 
• June 29, 2023: 2) the opportunity to be in the fields really working directly with people to learn about what they do, 3) beautiful sky, beautiful light & colors and lush landscapes (so beautiful today in the fields and in the pre-dinner walk a group of us took today). 
• June 30, 2026: 1) warm birthday wishes from the world over including good old Ben Hutchinson, 2) very sweet birthday card, 3) the taste of cake with chocolate frosting and two layers
• July 2, 2023: 2) the internet to carry my voice all the way to Mom & vice versa, 3) a new dish
• July 3, 2023: 1) The Togolese people’s openness and warmth & willingness to teach. What a gift. 2) My GCY experience for really forcing myself to sit with myself & deal with it — and to lean in to observing, lean into just existing with other people. 3) the ski=y, its many colors. The rich blue of tropical evenings. 
• July 4, 2023: 2) life’s funny connections
• July 6, 2023; 2) smell of clean laundry, 3) tea in the afternoon
• July 8, 2023: 1) teachers, 2) discovering I’ve become friends with people, 3) the ability of books to transport me far away & turn on the thinking gears
• July 10, 2023: 3) STARS!! Venus! The Milky Way!
• July 11, 2023: 3) podcasts, listened to This American Life while resting from my tummy troubles today
• July 12, 2023: 1) the good bodily feeling of getting work done, 2) popcorn & its existence here! 3) Blessing’s smile
• July 17th, 2023: 1) a warm friendly welcome from my CIF, 3) solid chats with friends (Chantae & Jane today)
• July 19, 2023: 1) my CIF took the time to return a pen I’d left at the meeting (must have held on to it all afternoon), 3) the comfortable feeling of chatting with Marissa in my room as I tidy things.
• July 20, 2023 1) The most incredible welcome imaginable (that could count for all three but I’ll continue), 2) a crescent moon hanging in a rich tropical sky four nights in a row — tonight yellower & slightly different tilt and a sillouette of the whole round thing, 3) My Kabye lessons 00 they really help me set off on the right foot & form positive reactions from others
• July 23, 2023: 5) Seeing a Baptism today! I’m not into the Assemblie de Dieu (which included an almost graphic sermon of King David’s adultery sin) but to see a community blessing & hoping for a good life for a sweet little thing — well that’s always good!
• July 27, 2023: 1) To hear Chilalo called out & to hear Mana called Maman Chilalo, 2) My work counterpart putting me in touch with all the important people (preparer le terrain), 3) a cool breeze through the window
• July 28, 2023: 1) the misty moon floating high above, 2) Mana coming by for an evening chat, 3) the privacy of night
• July 29, 2023: 1) The ability to contact people, 2) The calming energy of Mana, Aunt K & Uncle D, 3) that Uncle Dave said he was jealous of my new adventure — he always makes me think of things slightly differently, 4) the moon
• July 30, 2023: 1) Mana lending me her book, 2) Mana checking in on me and happily settling in to do some flashcards together, 3) glorious rain to shut everything down 🙂
• July 31, 2023: 3) the women showing up to my meeting
• August 1, 2023: 1) evening skies, 3) the ability to contact all those connections in my life — makes me feel warmly nested
• August 2, 2023: 1) a welcoming and safe host village/site 2) feeling clean after a shower, 3) the sleep I’m about to have
• August 3, 2023: 1) a little training center vacay, 3) G&G and being able to call them when I like 🙂 that really felt just so good to talk to them. So much love over a phone call. Wish I could given them a big hug. Wish I could have a big hug from any of my people
• August 5, 2023: 2) the relaxing care at my home in Tomegbe, 3) the privacy I had at site
• August 6, 2023: 1) Essi’s fromage & cooking in general — delicious!, 2) Tomegbe crew, 3) beautiful fabric
• August 7, 2023: 1) companionship through the frustrating moments, 2) Hunter’s presentation on compost & his success at site with that — informative & inspiring, 3) the waves of memories from Senegal that have been coming back to me lately
• August 10, 2023: 1) How good laughing feels when it just comes from being goofy while playing games, 4) Teachers as. Group of people, 5) Using the body — my body — well
• August 12, 2023: 1) see that (and being part of) that cozy night time family games and sleepiness, 2) help with laundry — there had been so much
• August 13, 2023: 1) Men you can trust & who will take you out of situations, 2) the apple & potato I ate today! Taste buds coming alive, 3) the sad comfort that women all over the world know how annoying drunk men are (bonding across cultures and languages)
• August 18, 2023: 1) moments of privacy/ non-professionalism, 2) the opportunity to see all this amazing dancing and hear this great music
• August 20, 2023: 1) an evening spent watching the sky change colors, bats swoop, and mother hen stuff all her chicks under her, 2) embracing the expectation & hope for self change, 3) potatoes with dinner tonight — yum!
• August 21, 2023: 1) good good novels, 2) the amazing variety of ways people live & are still so so so human, 3) the moon
• August 24, 2023: 1) starting a gratitude journal & learning about them back in GCY. I think it has fundamentally shaped how I interact in the world & with my own experiences
• August 25, 2023: 1) good sunshine to dry my laundry, 3) good teachers past & present
• September 4, 2023: 1) The pack of Oreos from the PSNs, they’ve been a steady little comfort. 2) Delphi’s kind smile when she runs up to help me carry the bucket and fill it. I’ve more or less decided to accept the help when its offered but also carry a bucket as well and try to befriend the girl. She practiced a little English with me today! It was sweet & well done! 3) the helping hand of just having someone invite me somewhere
• September 5, 2023: 3) amazing beautiful tropical light & color, 4) changing soundscape of the night, 5) stars!
• September 6, 2023: 1) Tchangani taking me to his home — a good walk and someone to guide my connections, 3) The ability to take it slow these first few days
• September 7, 2023: 1) good books, 2) magnificent clouds, 3) texting friends — so glad to get perspective & context for how things are going for them
• September 9, 2023; 1) brushing my teeth meaning at least a couple of minutes star gazing every night, 2) my brother, 3) plans to look forward to
• September 10, 2023: 1) Katja & new town discoveries, 2) Ag Gals, 3) privacy
• September 12, 2023: 3) my body’s own strength and abilities
• September 13, 2023: 1) being invited
• September 15, 2023: 1) a call from Courtney today, 2) new furniture meaning a cleaner floor & neater room!, 3) time for reflection & writing
• September 16, 2023: 1) a fully good day, 4) my new desk to write on!
• September 18, 2023: 1) The folks that have taken & continue to take me under their wing. Also in Tomegbe I once spent an afternoon watching a mother hen lead her chick around, then fluff herself up & tuck them all underneath. Being in agricultural spaces makes a lot of common metaphors’ meanings make a lot more sense/be more meaningful. 2) beautiful beautiful skies, 3) The total joy I was met with today (and other days) when I speak Kabye. It makes me joyous in turn and makes every effort well worth it
• September 19, 2023: 1) a beautiful glowing perfect hanging crescent moon, 4) Tchangani’s comment today. I think Agbalossi & I are well suited too — yay two years ahead!
• September 23rd: 1) this little boy (just walking) kicking me a small plastic soccer ball while Kapo was getting his helmet at the pâte stand. The kiddo had amazing aim. And it was so nice just play & fun/funny to be selected as the one to play by a child. He was running around totally naked to boot. 
• September 24, 2023: 1) Being able to call (& video call) Aunt Karen & Uncle Dave, 2) having a large & wonderful family that support me (each in their own way), 3) the power of a good walk
• September 25, 2023: 1) digital music so I can listen to Dean Martin and other favorites all the way out here, 2) happy moments practicing my language, 3) a good chat with. Zach, 4) an extremely bright moon to stare at (old man in it an all) and a speckling of stares while I talked on the phone. 
• September 28, 2023: 1) invitation to make pâte, 2) the smiles I receive when I try out Kabiye, 3) the rain! (In all its glory and memory)
• September 29, 2023: 1) to be known, 2) gifts of oranges, 3) taste of oranges, 4) seeing Erin
• September 30, 2023: 1) time working alongside people, 2) full moons, 3) bean dinners on the nights you really want them.
• October 2, 2023: 1) there amazing nights of bright glowing full (or there abouts) moons, 2) garlic — even if its so small it takes forever to peel 3) Guin Wright
• October 3, 2023: 1) my language tutor & the effort he makes, 2) invitations to eat, 3) books to read while it rains, 4) time to write & reflect — its a very lucky thing to have this time on my hands
• October 5, 2023: 1) growing up in a place where corporal punishment was not the norm, 2) hearing my name called out happily, 3) morning time for coffee and writing, I think this will become a special & important routine
• October 7, 2023: 1) growing friendships, 2) an absurd amount of sweet potatoes I bought
• October 7, 2023 evening: 1) privacy to have my own resting time, 4) everyone’s health at home being in good shape
• October 8, 2023: 1) Richard adding me to the call with G&G, 2) friendliness & openness to me by so many people in town, 3) the chicken that follows me as I work in the yard. He’s always making me laugh. Soon he’ll be as clingy as a pup.
• October 9, 2023: 2) Guin seeing me a photo of our Paris days
• October 10, 2023: 1) a day that full & busy and interesting, 4) rain to sing me to sleep, 5) a funny book to take a breaks from my emotional wreckage novels
• October 11, 2023: 2) the chance to love & come to know somewhere wholly different but wholly the same — full of people and stories and nature, 3) the wagashi I’m about to eat. 
• October 15, 2023: 2) Katja’s total joy at having us in her town, 3) the way the language and sounds of the market can reverberate in my head — echo — after I come home
• October 16, 2023: 1) a moment with Mana, 2) a magic moment of silent concentration as I taught (shows students are excited for more complex ideas, more engaged if they’re treated as intelligent), 3) that I had a restful week (emotionally) for this new week
• October 17, 2023: 1) One of my ginger field friends describing how hard I work to the group at the meeting, 2) CVD going into “Dad-mode” to get me a chauffer
• October 18, 2023: 3) Time to chat a lot with Courtney, 4) Today I bought my garden seeds!
• October 20, 2023: 1) the feeling of food filling up a house, 2) Salad & raw veggies — really gives energy in another kind of way! Feels good, 3) Being recognized & happily greeted at market — my teacher, my vegetable lady, ladies from Chief’s corn field harvest day, random others 4) my body that can carry on working until a job is done if I set my mind to it
• October 21, 2023: 1) a cooler night after a scorching day, 2) garlic, 3) my waiting bed
• October 24, 2023: 3) fresh coffee in all its warmth & glory
• October 25, 2023: 2) Mana calling me strong for my garden, its kind and reassuring, 3) a little moment with the cat. The cat came slinking through my yard and froze when I saw it & she saw me seeing. But I gave her some food & then turned away. After a moment she chewed away contentedly and stared at me for a bit before stalking off. I love animal company — slowly but surely I’ll win these over. The dogs won’t approach me, but they don’t bark at me anymore.
• October 26, 2023: 3) the exuberance of planting seeds!
• October 28, 2023: 1) Guin & our friendship, 2) An incredible butter moon tonight (almost a harvest one), 3) my markers — I started drawing with color again last night
• October 31, 2023: 1) Gardens as a whole — what a wonderful concept! 3) novels and the other worlds they contain
• November 1, 2023: 1) girls who want to learn & are brave enough to express it, 2) all the remembered and unremembered people who encouraged me, a girl who wanted to learn, 3) continued new growth in my garden — bean sprouts are so cute!
• November 4, 2023: 3) my flourishing bean sprouts! Taller every hour!
• November 7, 2023: 1) Folks that see me making an effort and appreciate it, 2) the fun of dancing a little even for preschool songs, 3) many many wonderful stars
• November 8, 2023: 2) a solid K through 12 education — once again today I was hit with random parts of science that students drew a total blank on, 3) little invitations — Jeanette inviting me to have chouk with her as she tried to sell used clothes.
• November 10, 2023: 3) a family that has always held me up from falling into a pit
• November 14, 2023: 1) a work friend in the making, 2) Gorgeous sunset (the new dustiness lets the colors spread, like LA smog sunsets?), 3) my own little home so I have the privacy to do nothing when I return (if I want)
• November 20, 2023: 3) family skype calls
• November 21, 2023: 2) cookies cookies 3) the letter from Madeline

Well, I couldn’t help myself and I went through all my journals and included something from nearly every single day I’ve been in Togo.  Going through my journal entries made me laugh, smile, and get a little teary eyed too. Tonight my gratitudes will probably include the sensation of reflecting on all I have experienced already after five months in Togo. 

I hope this selection has given you all a little insight into my life in Togo. It has been a while since I wrote. But I can assure you, there have been many drafts since my last post! If you’re curious about anything I wrote here, let me know! Maybe it will be good fodder to bring a draft to completion. 

I wish everyone a happy, healthy, and delicious Thanksgiving! I am overwhelmed by gratitude when I think of all the family and friends I love the whole world over (aka you!). 

Sending lots of love & good appetite,

Janet